This day was unavoidable.

But opening my eyes this weekend '30' was there blasting the ugly wake-up call of old age.

I was determined to go about my day as though none of this aging business was upon me.
Playing hookie from work, I went out and got some ridiculously decadent coffee and decided to do some Goodwilling.

But it was there between the racks skirting the edge of the shadows panting and snarling with bloodshot eyes.
 
I hoped doing something productive like grocery shopping would take my mind off of this loathsome stalker.
Yet while buying wine at the grocery store the 80 year old cashier smirked as she handled my license.
  
    "Well, you're older than I thought", the blue-black bouffant punctuated the word older.

Whether it was the whole bottle of wine or the old age, I was pleasantly surprised to end my day with dinner at my favorite eclectic seafood restaurant.

But amidst cheesy photo ops and smoked fish dip, I received the kiss of death...
Nestled among the fanfare and well-wishes was a birthday card from my arch-nemesis.

The card spared no gentleness in emblazoning my place in the sordid caste system of the craft world.  

    "I'll assume you spent your day cross-stitching as now you are old"

I was trapped and unable to look away any longer - adulthood had me firmly in it's clutches.I suppose it was a fair and easily afforded revenge after last year's Munny decapitation cake but the stark sentiment sucker-punched me.
 
With no exit, begrudgingly I take my scarlet lettered sweatshirt of old-age craftiness.  I leave behind the lanyard bracelets and baby-food jar snow globes of childhood craftiness in search of ladies' auxiliary craft shows and spoon cozies. 

There is nothing to be done other than to grab my Maxine mug and start plotting my nemesis's next insultingly bad birthday gift.

So Speaking of Craft Fails...

 A craft gone wrong can ruin your reputation in the blink of an eye. If this happens you might as well start crocheting cake cozies with cat hair - 'cause your projects will be banished to the depths of the rows of folding tables at women's club craft fairs.

(Yeah, yeah - I can hear the hate mail now...but if I see one more clown hugging a pot of cacti or faceless pantyhose child facing a wall a'la The Blair Witch Project...so help me the Happy Painter gets it!)  

So, uh, cough cough - I mentioned the Craft Fail website in my last post...so it's only fair to show you one of my fails.

Meet the Munny cake - duhn, duhn ,duhhhhh!

It began well enough - I even did a little research.  How to make your own pan.  Scratch that - I had gotten to that point because I had tried my shaky little hand at carving pound cake into the shape I wanted with unnerving results.  So I went about looking for tips to use any object to form your own pan.
  
But as soon as I introduced cake batter into my foil shell it burst like a cheap swim toy.

Soooo I had the bright idea to use cast material over the foil to better define the shape and give the batter some support.

 All I can tell you is that no amount of icing made this acceptable.  None!

My stupid pride be damned I should have bought a lovely card from the Dollar Tree.

But I couldn't bring myself to abandon all my hard work!  I choose to give this monstrosity and in turn I created a craft-nemesis...

Take heed my craft cupcakes:
Your crafting can be your undoing!